It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

....and that scares the crap out of me.  When I was a kid, I would wait impatiently for the holidays to arrive and it seemed like it took FOREVER.  Now that I'm not a kid anymore, I am beginning to realize why my parents sometimes seemed a bit overwhelmed by this 'festive' season.

It's crazy man.  I remember thinking (on my birthday in October) "wow, I should probably get some ideas together for Christmas, just so that I'm not behind the eight ball."  Hey, guess what?  I am directly behind the eight ball.  Little Man has a birthday in two days.  I'm not ready.  Basketball has started.  I'm not ready.  Company Christmas Party this weekend.  I'm not ready.  Are you seeing a pattern here?  Not to mention that I haven't bought one Christmas present.  WHAAAAA!!!!

I'm happy to report that the picture is recent....so at least I have the decorating done.  Whew.  This is where my OCD goes into overdrive and I start writing sticky notes and placing them all over.  Odd little things that don't make sense to anyone's brain but my own.  "File. Sync. Cancel."  or "Marbled Cheesecake.  Make bites?"  I write things down to get the disorganized, organized.  I'm still feeling overwhelmed.  This is why children love Christmas and adults are 73% more likely to commit suicide this time of year.  Sorry, bad joke.  I pulled that statistic right out of my ass.  I'm sure there are those of you who wish that I would stick it back up there.  Point taken.  Nothin but love for my peeps, and I hope none of you are suicidal.  I'm not.  I just keep thinking how much I would like to drink my way through the holidays like Karen off of Will & Grace.  Just a thought.  It won't happen.  I'm far too responsible, but I fantasize about such things.  Yes that's right; instead of fantasizing about hot, half naked men on a beach somewhere remote....I fantasize about a holiday bender so I can sluff my grown up duties.  LOL  Being a grown up is SOOOOOO HAAAAAARRRRRD.  That was as whiny as I can be on a blog.  My mama can probably still hear that voice in her head.  Love ya mama.

And speaking of my mama, she sent me the most incredible purse.  Loves it, so I had to share my joy.  It's from a company called Thirty One and you buy the basic purse and then put different "skirts" on your purse depending on your mood.  I've died.  I've died a Rachel Zoe style-gasm death.  Oh happy me.  My next step is to buy every skirt imaginable because this sort of change makes me VERY happy.  It helped my 'holiday holy shits' like you wouldn't believe to have a new purse.  Thank you mama.  You kinda rock.

Now on to the news.

I read last night on Twitter, Facebook, and E! News that Guiliana Rancic is going to have a double mastectomy.  *sigh*  My holiday holy shits are looking much smaller and much more pathetic.  This is mind blowing sad news.  Is is strange to anyone that I immediately felt my boobs when I found out about her breast cancer and again I felt my boobs when I heard the latest?  It's like someone mentioning bed bugs and trying not to itch yourself.  Only this isn't a gross out moment, this is a fear moment.  I'm praying for her and her family and cussing to the depths of Hell, all cancer.  Not great news.  Poor G, though I saw a self portrait of a woman who had also undergone a double mastectomy and I remember thinking how cool she looked.  No boobs sort of made her look like a modern warrior, strong and formidable.  Maybe that sounds weird, but it's how I felt.

As for upbeat news, I'm being a pretty good duck.  I'm out of my funk and continuing to paddle like hell.  It's what I do.  Little Man had a horrible cough yesterday, and this morning....then when I took him to the doctor..."eh, he's fine, send him to school."  Just what I wanted, to spend money on a unneeded doctor visit, but I guess it's better safe than sorry.  I was just glad that LM actually wanted to go to school.  It could be that I told him that if he stayed home, it would be bed, and no Nintendo DS games.

What does Little Man want for Christmas?  An iPod touch so that he can play Angry Birds.  I can't even figure out how to play Angry Birds on my iPod touch.  Oh if only they made that game for Nintendo, then children all over the world would rejoice.

Still type, type, typing away on my book trying to get it edited and transcribed to the computer.  Talk about a time consuming job.  I still haven't begun my query.  I'm a bit scared of that first rejection letter or simply no response.  Maybe I'll wait until after Christmas to have my ego bruised.

Make a nice day, and don't forget to feel your boobies.  I'm just sayin'.